One-liners and other memorable moments from Miami mayoral debate

Miami’s mayoral circus came to the Hyatt Regency Monday night, where six of the 13 hopefuls — which already felt like too many — crammed onto a stage for a debate that was more cafecito-fueled food fight than civic forum.
Traffic, flooding, homelessness, affordable housing, legal fees, corruption — they were all on the agenda. But what really animated the night were the sharp elbows, the personal digs, and the not-so-subtle reminders that Miami politics is still more blood sport than policy seminar.
There’s a lot to unpack here, so this is just going to be Ladra’s first pass. We still have to do a fact check on a lot of the claims that were made. And a breakdown of how each candidate answered (or not) questions about the issues. Stay tuned for all of that.
Read related: Miami mayoral hopefuls face off — but only the “top six” make debate cut
But we can immediately celebrate the zingers and one-liners that came from former Miami Commissioner Ken Russell and former City Manager Emilio Gonzalez, who were both the best prepared and who Ladra declares the winners. Russell, in particular, outperformed Miami-Dade Commissioner Eileen Higgins, who is competing for the same votes and is supposed to be the front runner.
“I did leave ten months early on an eight year term, but I didn’t leave in handcuffs, like you,” Russell told former City Commissioner Alex Diaz de la Portilla, who was suspended from office in September 2023 after his arrest on public corruption charges including bribery and money laundering, which were dropped late last year. ADLP — who was alternately defensive or dismissive when he wasn’t beating his chest about vindication — had just attacked him.
“You ran for three different offices when you were commissioner. You left early. You had a hissy fit. You ran out of your last meeting. You never passed anything,” Diaz de la Portilla said, although Russell did pass legislation as a commissioner. “So you are not going to be the leader of anything, or the adult in the room. You are the child in the room.”
Maybe The Dean should look in a mirror. Then he would see how much eye-rolling and smirking he did at his coming out party. Diaz de la Portilla acted like a sleepy toddler from the beginning — he was either late or hung back to make an entrance, depending on who you ask — to the end. He barely answered questions, using his time to hit Russell and Higgins. He used his closing two minutes, instead of talking about what he would do as mayor, attacking Higgins with some anti-woke babbling that isn’t going to play in that room.
“You want sanctuary cities? She’s to my left,” he said, pulling out that old communista card at the end of the night. “Defunding the police? She’s to my left. Cashless bail? She’s to my left. You want Miami to look like Portland or Chicago? She’s to my left.”
Maybe he was recording it for an out-of-context commercial. Nah. Because he looked drunk, angry and stupid. It was hard to watch because he was once drunk, giddy and brilliant. Someone mentioned that it seemed like alcohol has degraded his brain. He said the word “absurd,” a lot. It’s one of his favorites.
Read related: Eileen Higgins qualifies for Miami mayoral race, launches new video ad
And he pulled out the old “not one of us” card. “Just because you have a Cuban coffee and you play dominos does not mean you are part of that Cuban community,” he said, to Higgins. Is he going to recycle his “Cuban, vote for a Cuban,” mailers?
Diaz de la Portilla also seems like he he is running either to (a) redeem himself after his arrest — which is why the “political persecution” schtick is such a part of his campaign — or (b) help out his old frenemy, Miami Commissioner Joe Carollo, who he left almost hand in hand with, or shoulder-to-shoulder, all buddy-buddy, like they have a secret pact or something (more on that later).
Higgins looked tired — like her bedtime was approaching — and didn’t bring the energy she had at the Florida Rising candidate forum. That was also more her crowd. Tuesday’s shindig was hosted by the Downtown Neighbors Alliance, which has been critical of Higgins’ stance — or lack thereof — on the Miami Downtown Development Authority, which takes an additional tax from downtown property owners who want it to be eliminated.
She gets points for showing up at all, since her camp seems to think she’s going to win it anyway. And she gets points for sticking with the DDA in an anti-DDA crowd, explaining that she doesn’t think the city would provide the additional services that she, the only candidate who lives downtown, pays extra taxes for. She didn’t backpedal. Good for her.
But for all her talk about going to Washington and pulling federal dollars back home, Higgins seemed at times like a deer in the headlights.
And the headlights were Carollo and Diaz de la Portilla, who win first and second place, respectively, in who not to vote for. Higgins just doesn’t know how to deal with these two blowhards, who turned that stage into a Miami city commission meeting, circa 2022. There were times La Gringa threw her arms up in despair, practically begging the moderator, CBS Miami News Anchor Eliott Rodriguez, to moderate. But there was nothing he could do. He is but a mere human.
Someone desperately needed a chancleta.
And Russell must have done something terrible in a past life to have drawn the lucky podium between Carollo and ADLP, who took turns attacking him. He held his own. At one point, he quipped that Diaz de la Portilla wanted to rebut every time someone said the word “corruption.”
Read related: Miami’s Alex Diaz de la Portilla arrested on corruption, pay-for-play park deal
While Higgins and Gonzalez got the most applause — each from their own grupito of friends — Russell got a lot of unexpected laughs from the audience and, Ladra dares say, probably turned some votes. He shook off the nice-guy underdog vibe and his performance — sharper, more confident, more mayoral — pushed him up a notch closer to the perceived front-runners and made him look like a real contender.
Gonzalez also did well. He got what was arguably the biggest applause when he reminded people that he was the one who got the mayoral race back on track the ballot after the city commission voted to change the election from odd- to even-numbered years, which effectively and conveniently extended everybody’s terms by 12 months.
“I am the only one on stage here who is not a politician,” Gonzalez said. “But for me, we wouldn’t even be in this room.”
He talked about is daughter not being able to afford to live in Miami and a lot about corruption — “it isn’t even individual corruption, it’s systemic corruption” — and his relationships in Tallahassee and Washington. “I’m the common sense guy.”
Ladra thought his closing statement had too much about his 26 years in the military, especially with what’s going on across the country with the president trying to send troops into U.S. cities. But Gonzalez said he focused on his teaching gig at West Point — the instilling of “character” and always choosing what’s right over what’s easy — and he connected with the crowd, which was made up of a lot of his friends and supporters anyway.
“The bottom line is leadership. The mayor sets the stage, sets the tone, sets the tenor.”
And, yet, his best moment was probably when he accused Carollo of shaking people down for 40 years. “I guarantee you, people aren’t giving you money because they believe in your Judeo-Christian values,” Gonzalez told him.
Read related: In Miami mayoral bid, Emilio Gonzalez goes for the law and order vote
Carollo’s tone and tenor throughout was angry and defiant. He asked Gonzalez how he paid the legal fees for his lawsuit against the city — which is ironic since the city has paid millions in legal fees for Carollo — and suggested that the former manager’s firm, at which he is a partner, invested $500,000 in the campaign because they want something in return. “He’s going to be their consultant, making money on the side,” Carollo bellowed.
At one point, Carollo yelled at the audience, which booed him regularly. “Wait a minute! This is a democracy! You let me speak,” Carollo shouted, even though he went over the time limit almost every time he spoke.
And, of course, he attacked the media, too, for the coverage of the jury award of $63.5 million against him for violating the First Amendment rights of two Little Havana businessmen — and scores of others — for having supported his opponent in the 2017 election.
Former Commissioner Mayor Sir Xavier Suárez is a nice person and a statesman who doesn’t belong in this clown car. Ladra almost forgot to write about his participation because it was meh, even though he got some polite applause and a few uncomfortable laughs. He joked about being an “inverse dynasty,” because his son — the current mayor — was 8 years old when he became the first Cuban-born mayor of Miami.
But he seemed stuck in the past, talking about 1985 and 2002 because he wants to sound experienced. But he just sounded old and out of touch. He opened with a quote, which we should have all known he would do, and plugged his website, one of his books and one of his white papers.
Professor X still has a lot to teach us. He should stick to that. Maybe do a YouTube channel.
Still, he was much better than Carollo, who was easily baited by the mere presence of award-winning filmmaker and Miami activist Billy Corben, one of his most prolific critics. “These are the people who want to support this guy,” he said, pointing to Gonzalez, because Carollo would much rather face him in a runoff than Higgins. “Is this how he’s going to run City Hall?”
At least Suarez looked and sounded like he wanted to be there.
In his closing two minutes, Russell suggested the audience check out the other seven candidates who weren’t invited on the stage because they did not get at least 5% in a poll of likely voters. But first time hopeful Kenneth James DeSantis, a late entry into the race who calls the guv “Uncle Ron,” was in the audience. And he got an education.
“For me, it was a real missed opportunity not to be on that stage, because after watching it, I know I would have held my own,” DeSantis told Ladra. “What struck me most was how much a circus it became, from beginning to end. From a group of supposedly seasoned candidates, I expected more statesmanship and sharper debate skills. Some couldn’t even deliver a coherent closing statement. There was a clear lack of decorum and seriousness, at least from several of the contenders.”
Apparently, he hasn’t seen a single city commission meeting.
“It felt like watching the old guard cling to the past, and it reinforced exactly why Miami needs fresh leadership,” DeSantis said. “Our city deserves better than what we saw on that stage.”
Ladra’s gonna keep digging where the politicians don’t want the light to shine. You can help. If you value this kind of independent, watchdog journalism, throw a bone in the bowl here. Every little bit helps keep the bark loud and the bite sharp.
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